I KNOW WHAT TO DO BUT I DON'T DO IT (II)

I was talking about knowing things to do but do not really want to do it in fact. I kind of promise that I will continue to talk about it, and  It’s a bit sad knowing that I posted that on March 3 2016, and I am now just typing to continue my writes

Ups! So long, in fact that’s too long for a write up. Sorry, I was just too busy on the work and (again. Sorry!) I was just too lazy. Aha!!

COMFORT, was one topic that I brought up as a cause why people don’t really do what they already knew they have to do. We are too afraid or too comfortable to leave our comfort zone. Change is good, but frankly speaking, its scary as well, too much worries

The second thing is GOAL. What about it?

I took a Mandarin class couple years back, it was just because in the city like Surabaya with huge Chinese community, ability of speaking Mandarin is a plus in person qualification. Its interesting , while in my daily work, speaking Mandarin is not needed at all, Mandarin proficiency is not much needed in the field I am into. So, long story short, I went through the course in full spirit in the first week, but when dealing with the difficulty of writing Mandarin letters (Chinese Pin Yin), I gave up.

Why? Because I do not have a clear goal of doing this thing. Clear goal or target is an energy we need to fight when dealing with struggles / barrier or obstacles. I could not find the important points of speaking Mandarin incorporated it to my daily work. I can only speak little bit in Mandarin just because of growing up in Chinese family. Well, to some people to sacrifice their time to learn something new is good, but to me in this kind of thing, especially in learning Mandarin, aaah, I just don’t like it. AHA! 

It leads me to the third thing I’m gonna talk about, PREFERENCE

I love to read and sing. Reading and singing are never boring to me, its always bring joy and cheerfulness. Find things you like, and get into it. By having it we can go on and on joyfully. I do not have to think whether or not they will be useful in work or daily life, I just like it, I love it.

We know we have to do things but do not want to do it well. Check those three items : COMFORT, GOAL, PREFERENCE

What about living a healthy life, go on a diet, do exercise? Those are all must do things. Get out of our comfort zone? Aaaah, big NO, fighting a battle of laziness, aaah no no no (Hey, this has already been my constant battle hahaaaa). We don’t want to loose the battle (of course), but how many time we fail, we know how the guilty feeling will ruin us. But the show must go on, life must be lived healthy and well

I make a peace of myself. I accept my self the way I am and forever thankful of this curvy body GOD has entrusted to me. I do what I like to do in align that with a healthy living style. I do walking, I eat what I like but I limit it, I sing and never stop practicing to strengthen my diaphragm muscle. I do it in a pleasant way, and I go on

I KNOW WHAT TO DO BUT I DON'T DO IT

“Why don’t I do what I know I should do?” - Ever asked yourself that question?

Most of the time, we all know what we need to do things in order to attain our goals. That’s not the issue. We know what needs to be done. We just don’t do it. Why is it so hard to do what we must do to succeed, if we really want to succeed?

Perhaps we don’t want it THAT BAD?

That’s probably the case. We may tell ourselves we want to succeed, but if we cannot do whatever it may be to get there, then we don’t really desire it. We are not “hungry” enough. We want it, just not bad enough.

So what causes this?

COMFORT 

My mother always said, “Don’t be TOO comfortable, otherwise, you stop advancing”. It’s true. When we are in a position where we are comfortable & safe, it is extremely hard to get ourselves to move out of this “zone”. After all, it is human nature to seek comfort. Even if we may be looking at even more comfort with the added success, we are just not willing to give some of that current comfort to get there.

I have a friend who was looking into starting her own business. She had a great idea, good plans, and was pretty much ready to go. However, she needed to go at it full time. Therefore, she had to leave her current job, and she didn’t have a problem with that. The problem was, with the lack of money she would find herself with for the next year or so. You see, for her, she couldn’t give up her shopping, her nights out, her fancy suppers, etc. to fund her business. She was not willing to give part of her comfort to ultimately gain more later on. Yes, she wanted to do this business. She understood that in the long run, owning your own business is more beneficial than her current situation. However, she obviously did not want it bad enough. Because if she would have, she wouldn’t have a problem giving up some of her current perks to eventually gain much bigger ones.

Also, the fear of change & being stuck in a routine can destroy our motivation to move ahead. It’s like stepping into the unknown, and yes, we naturally do not like this. However, the quicker we understand that evolving is necessary for success, the easier it will be for us to get ourselves to do what we need to get done. Just know that we can adapt to any new situation. Humans are made to be this way. This is why we can live in very hot or very cold weather for example. We have a tremendous ability to adapt, so keeping that in mind eases the perception of change.

------to be continued-----

HIGH SCHOOL SILVER REUNION 2015

25 years after my high school graduation, we are all invited to REUNI PERAK - SMAGA batch 1990 in Kediri, my hometown, last December. I and Kiki flew to Kediri and spent our Christmas and year end holidays, while I attended my high school reunion

We stayed at one of the hotels in the city, and I didn't visit my childhood house this time, just paid a visit to my parents grave

Well, whether we like it or not, we are all like to be connected to our teenage years in some way. High school friends bring that connection. When you reconnect with a high school friend it is like nothing has ever changed. It could be the “group” you belonged to, or that you saw each other literally for seven times a day, or the sports you played. With your high school friends you get back into the swing of things in a millisecond.

OUR FLOWERY WEEKEND ESCAPADE

I wanna share our (what I called) flowery weekend escapade on the first week of December last year. It's a bit late post though but its too bad for not sharing the beauty of those flowers, or the beauty of us in these pictures, ha ha haaa just saying

It was happen when Kiki had her year end holiday and spent her time in Bandung and of course that this flower garden is so well known and become the hot topics of one of the sceneric photo spots, we have planned to go there

If life is a flower, then love is the beauty of that flower. Enjoy viewing and happy weekend!

HALLELUJAH

Hasil berselancar di Youtube membawa saya kepada klip film Shrek. (Just for your information, saya hanya suka nonton film yang realistic. Drama, true story or whatever that is related to daily life, bukan film “khayal”.  Science fiction atau film animasi atau film tokoh – tokoh Marvel sama sekali bukan film favorite saya, apalagi Shrek, kecuali Anda butuh teman menonton film film semacam itu, for the sake of friendship, saya akan bersedia duduk (mungkin tertidur) disamping Anda selama Anda nonton ha ha haaa …)

Klip tiba di bagian dimana putri Fiona mengepas baju pengantin dengan ekspresi wajah tertekan.  Adegan itu dilatari sebuah lagu yang dilantunkan dengan gaya sendu diseret-seret. Kegetiran putri Fiona bertambah menusuk dengan latar belakang lagu itu. Waktu itu saya ngga tahu liriknya. Bahasa Inggris saya ngga kelewat jelek juga sih, tapi ketika lagu itu dibawakan secara setengah menggumam, saya musti benar – benar pasang kuping dan menyimak, bahkan sempat membayangkan, vokalisnya menyanyi dengan sebatang cerutu digigit di antara geraham, yang saya tangkap hanya ada kata “Halleluya”

Naah, lagu inilah yang bikin saya “mendadak cinta” dan ingin saya share pemikiran saya tentang itu. Biasalah, kalau lagi suka banget dengan sesuatu saya pasti akan berusaha mencari tahu lebih dalam (alias kepo). Saya bukan penulis lagu, bukan musician plus ngga pernah belajar musik, dan ngga ngerti teori musik Saya hanya terbius oleh lagu ini dan menyanyikan-nya (mungkin) sudah ratusan kali (dikamar saya, tentunya)! Tapi jika Anda mau, saya akan dengan senang hati alias girang banget menyanyikan lagu ini utk Anda. Percayalah, suara saya ngga jelek jelek amat. Jadi, apa yang saya tulis disini adalah hasil penelusuran saya plus penalaran a la kadarnya ditambah daya khayal saya yang kadang agak kebablasan … ha ha haaaa

Saya terdorong untuk mencari si soundtrack dan informasinya karena beberapa hari kemudian, lagu itu “mendadak dangdut” berdendang-dendang sendiri di kepala saya. Dan seperti biasa, setelah menyimak (puluhan kali) di Youtube, saya search di Wikipedia yang tentu saja “memuntahkan” informasi yang cukup lengkap ditambah beberapa blog yang berkontribusi hingga saya mendapat informasi (hampir lengkap) tentang lagu itu. Judul lagu itu adalah ”Hallelujah”. Penulisnya orang Kanada, Leonard Cohen, yang merilis lagu itu pada tahun 1984. Lagu yang di film Shrek 1 merupakan cover version, dinyanyikan oleh John Cale. Ternyata, sudah banyak artis yang membawakan lagu tersebut, baik untuk rekaman maupun konser.

Melihat sepintas dari judulnya orang akan mengira ini lagu rohani Kristen. Meskipun mengambil judul istilah religius, "Hallelujah" - terpujilah Tuhan - lagu ini tidak menyanyikan tentang pujian bagi Tuhan melainkan bicara seputar hubungan percintaan antara laki-laki dan perempuan, pengkhianatan, perselingkuhan dan perzinahan. Jadi meskipun warna musiknya merupakan gabungan waltz dan gospel (lagu gereja pada umumnya gereja protestant) lagu ini lebih sebagai lagu cinta ketimbang lagu rohani.

Berbeda dengan “Hallelujah” karya George Frederic Handel (23 February 1685 – 14 April 1759) yang teramat agung, lagu Hallelujah karya Cohen ini lebih merupakan karya satiris. Memang enak didengar, tapi sebenarnya isinya agak-agak vulgar. Setelah membaca liriknya, alis saya kembali terangkat. Persis seperti yang dituangkan dalam Wikipedia, lagu ini merujuk kepada kisah di Alkitab - Perjanjian Lama untuk dijadikan simbolisasi ide lagu. Lagu ini berlandaskan kisah raja Daud (David, in English). salah seorang penulis kitab Mazmur atau puji-pujian untuk Allah.

Kisah lainnya yang kontroversial adalah keinginan Daud untuk –memperistri- istri orang lain. Kalau pernah denger lagu ”Mad About You”nya Sting (”…It would make a prison of my life, if you become another’s wife”… ). Nah, kurang lebih seperti itulah kisah raja Daud dan kisah ini tertulis di Alkitab di 2 Samuel 11 - 12

Jadi ceritanya, pada suatu petang, raja Daud berjalan-jalan di atap istananya. Entah bagaimana desain rumah saat itu dan berapa sih jaraknya antara satu bangunan dengan bangunan lainnya, akan tetapi dari atap itu, sang penguasa tersebut dapat mengintip ke rumah tetangga. Raja melihat seorang perempuan yang sangat elok rupanya sedang mandi (jadi ingat kisah Jaka Tarub? Ya, pelecehan semacam itu sudah ada dari dulu).

Tanpa takut dengan ancaman matanya bakal bintitan karena ngintip, raja malah “kepo” dengan mengirim detektif untuk menginvestigasi jatidiri perempuan itu. Singkat kata singkat cerita, didapatlah informasi bahwa dia adalah Batsyeba dan dia adalah  istri Uriah orang Het. Tidak puas dengan info itu, Daud malah mengirim ajudan untuk menjemput Batsyeba. Batsyeba datang ke tetangganya, yang tidak lain adalah rumah raja, dan ”tidur” dengan si raja.

OK, stop sampai sini dulu! Saya ngga peduli apa penafsiran orang lain, tapi dari perspektif saya, ini jelas sexual violence berbasis jenis kelamin, berbasis kelas, berbasis minoritas, dan sangat jelas kekuasaan memegang peranan besar. Kemudian Batsyeba pulang, dan beberapa waktu kemudian menyadari bahwa dirinya hamil.  Batsyeba, melalui kurir, menyampaikan berita tsb kepada raja. Raja lalu dengan strategis memerintahkan Yoab, ”Tempatkanlah Uria di barisan depan dalam pertempuran yang paling hebat, kemudian kamu mengundurkan diri daripadanya, supaya ia terbunuh mati.” (2 Samuel 11:15) Untuk selanjutnya silakan baca di Alkitab – Perjanjian Lama. Intinya, ada kekerasan seksual, power over, kelicikan, dan pembunuhan.

Ini penafsiran bebas saya (once again, saya bukan ahli music bahkan saya tidak belajar teori music)

Bait pertama lagu itu berbunyi demikian :

I’ve heard there was a secret chord

That David played and it pleased the Lord

But you don’t really care for music, do you?

It goes like this

The fourth, the fifth

The minor fall, the major lift

The baffled king composing Hallelujah

Lirik lagu ini mengingatkan saya akan lagu “Lupa-Lupa Ingat”-nya Kuburan Band (yang sepertinya sudah benar – benar almarhum sekarang). Kalau lagunya Kuburan, kan: “C, A minor, B minor, ke D, ke C lagi…”. Nah kalau di lagu Hallelujah jadi  “It goes like this: the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall, and the major lift…” yang selaras dengan chord-nya F – G – Am – F. Tapi, lebih dari itu, saya juga menafsirkannya : yang submisif mengalah dan yang dominan menguasai.

Bait keduanya seperti ini :

Your faith was strong, but you needed proof

You saw her bathing on the roof

Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you

She tied you to a kitchen chair

She broke your throne, she cut your hair

And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah.

Keindahan lirik yang disusun oleh Cohen tampil di baris pertama dan kedua awal bait kedua ini.  Saya teringat dengan dua lagu Indonesia, Sabda Alam-nya Ismail Marzuki dan Kala Cinta Menggoda-nya Chrisye. The fundamental question, was that love or lust?

Nah, mengenai she cut your hair, itu bukan tentang salon yaa, berhubung sebelumnya udah membahas tokoh di Alkitab Perjanjian Lama, maka mau ngga mau saya mengkaitkannya dengan kisah Samson dan Delilah (tertulis di kitab Hakim-hakim pasal 16).  Memang agak ngga nyambung, antara Daud-Batsyeba dengan Samson-Delilah. Nah, adegan gunting rambut (tanpa  cuci-blow) itu, apa lagi kalau bukan sexual attraction (also known as “lust”) yang membuat si lelaki (Samson) lengah hingga rela membeberkan rahasia kekuatan dirinya kepada si jelita yang ternyata mata-mata. Apakah itu ketidak-berdayaan sang penguasa  menghadapi sang pujaan atau kelicikan sang “penggoda”?  Dan tokoh Matahari jaman prasejarah itu pun tidak lain hanya korban manipulasi dan ke-submisif-an posisinya, sebagai perempuan di masyarakat yang patriarkis. (Jiaaah, bahasa saya …. sophisticated bangetzz yah? Ha ha haaaaa)

Bait-bait lagu selanjutnya menggambarkan kegetiran dan ironi yang dideskripsikan sebagai “broken Hallelujah”. Selain bernafaskan erotisme dan politis, beberapa penyanyi dan penulis menafsirkan lagu ini sebagai lagu tentang relasi manusia, cinta, makna atau ketiadaan makna kehidupan, keputusasaan, ketidakberdayaan, kerapuhan, kemarahan, penderitaan, dan kesia-siaan. Dari berbagai versi lagu ini yang paling saya suka adalah yang dinyanyikan Alexandra Burke. Ironinya tetap mengiris, namun terkesan kuat.

JOGJA - A WAY BACK TO LOVE

Jogja is always special to me and I always feel a unique sense upon getting to Jogja. Its about friendship and love and feeling of peace. I feel like having soul connection with this city. One of the reasons is that couple of important turning points of my life was taking place here.

I was travelling to Jogja on this last week end for I have to obtain some documents to the civil registrar related to my personal particular papers. I was lived in Jogja for about 7 years and my daughter Kiki was born there as well so her birth certificate (one of the document I was about to endorse) was issued by civil registrar of Jogja.

Of course beside the main reason I also add some lovely excited and sorely missed plan to do while in Jogja, which are meet up my friends, eat local food, and visit some iconic photo spots

Kebun Buah Mangunan is one of the destination I was about to go. Having breakfast of local and authentic food of Jogja at the Pelataran Makam Seniman in traditional buffet style is also something interesting to do. Bubur Gudeg, Mendoan and sip Wedang Uwuh I was feeling truly Jogja …..

I happened to have lunch at Mangut Lele Mbah Marto in Nggeneng Village. What special about this eating place is that food served in the kitchen (don’t think of modern kitchen), a very traditional villager’s kitchen with firewood. Angkringan KR, in front of the head office of Kedaulatan Rakyat newspaper was also unique eating place we visited. Angkringan is small food stall, which are located at the side of many roads. The customers are various including street musicians. 

So, here are our pictures and if you enjoy these beautiful snapshot especially which were taken in Kebun Buah Mangunan, my hat's off to Ninik for her amazing touch. 

Jogja …..  My feet may leave but not my heart.

Special note to Mas Rachman, Ninik and Fitri ..... I know that 'thank you' is not enough to express my gratitude, from the bottom of my heart, again terima kasih dari ku & Kiki.

Sampai ketemu lagi yaaaa ----- peluk dari jauh

MY STARWOOD JOURNEY

If life is a journey, a part of the journey is with Starwood. 

I was starting the journey in 2004 in PGFC Sheraton Surabaya and left the property in 2007, and back in 2013 in Sheraton Bandung. What I love most is the value we share in Starwood, "Bringing joy, care and excellence to associates, guests, and partners, always!"

I found passion, courage, people learn, change and grow. My role in Starwood has helped me to learn more about people and development, and to be agile, ready for changes. It is wonderful journey to learn & grow, where we treat mistakes as the opportunity to learn.

This is my journey!!  

SHORT GETAWAY TO BALEKAMBANG BEACH

We packed our bags to a short getaway on last long weekend. We left for Balekambang Beach at the south of Malang at around 7 early morning, stopped by at "Nyamleng" to have breakfast and heading to Malang.

I have searched through the internet of how beautiful beaches along the south Java sea shore, and found out that Balekambang has the most easiest way to reach out. The Hindu pura Ismoyo on the Ismoyo Island is another fascinating thing to visit and of course a very picturesque spot.

Here are some of our snapshot. Enjoy!

SUNDAY BRUNCH - TIME WELL SPENT

Its Sunday! Everyone has a favorite place when it comes to relishing a spot of Sunday lunch (or brunch?). I choose to spend my time taking pictures, enjoy the live music and remarkable meals on Sunday brunch. In Sheraton Bandung the list of favorites is so varied you could treat yourself to a great & remarkable of Sunday brunch in some very unique settings.

Frankly speaking, I am not that satisfied with the results of my photo taking, not so happy with the colors, retouched here and there to have them vivid and "alive", angle (even that I struggling to really take just & good shots from the right angles), but somehow I certainly enjoy my food and a time well spent with my dear friend Roberto. Hope next week in a better mood I would take better pictures. Finger crossed :)